The Disappointing Birthday

Today is my Birthday. I’m 8 years old. I’m lingering in my comfy chair, dreaming about this special day. I have high hopes.What fun activities have they planned? Perhaps an excursion, or a play date?

Oh I forgot… Dennis is in quarantine, he just got back from San Francisco, he’s stuck at home. That means no excursion, damn it!

Incidentally, I was thrilled to pick him up at the airport, finally, after five weeks away he was coming home. Now you’d think Dennis would be interested in how his Long Lost Boxer girl had been. Well, I’ve got news for you: he wasn’t!

The only thing he could talk about was little Baby J, his grandson. It was Baby J this, Baby J that, and “He’s the cutest”, “He’s soooo adorable”…etc… it went on the whole way back home…and hasn’t stopped since.

He’s shown a picture of Baby J to everyone, whether they’re interested or not, the viewing is mandatory.

Honestly becoming a grandparent alters peoples minds and priorities. They all seem to think their grandchildren are the smartest, the most gorgeous and are bound to win a Nobel prize. We know Veronica is hopeless on that matter, but I’d hoped Dennis would act more dignified.

I do love the family babies, they’re all very cute, and that’s all well and good as long as everyone remembers I was here first! Also these Grandparents, i.e. Dennis and Veronica, need to stop this nutty behaviour. It’s embarrassing.

I was slightly annoyed when the B-day started like any old whatever day with a long walk in the woods.

Come think of it there’s probably an amazing surprise waiting for me when we come home. Yes of course, it makes total sense, get the Birthday girl out of the house and then….

…nothing, nil, zilch! What’s going on here? I haven’t even got the “Now that you’re 8 you have to act your age” talk. I’m seriously concerned.

Suddenly, Veronica calls me; “Felicia, we’re going to see Dr L”. What’s that now? Did I hear her right? Going to the Dr?? ON MY BIRTHDAY??!! Seriously? Don’t get me wrong, I love Dr. L and all, but on any other day, not my birthday.

Apparently I have to have an 8 Years Old check up. Is that Veronica’s idea of Birthday fun? What’s wrong with her? I’m furious!

Dr L on the other hand, is very happy to see me, my anger abated slightly, (I mean it’s not his fault Veronica’s lost her mind) As a matter of fact his whole team greets me warmly.

Clearly I’m a celebrity over here, what with my 4 surgeries, they adore me, as well they should. I’m a very special Boxer girl. “Felicia the Brave Medical Hero”.

Dr L does a thorough check up. My general condition is good and he cannot find any new tumours.

He’s especially happy with my muscles after my two knee surgeries. The rehab therapy and our long walks did the job. I’m like a body builder.

Dr L mentions my zen attitude, what can I say, this is not my first rodeo!

Veronica and Dr L talk, and talk, and talk… no surprise here, Veronica is a compulsive chatter, she talks to perfect strangers all the time, on walks, with sales assistant, or taxi drivers, etc.

The absolutely amazing thing is that they always end up pouring out their life story to her, in every detail! After a ride to the airport of 20 m, she knew all about the Taxi driver’s family, the problem with his MIL, his baby daughter, the house he wants to buy, etc. Insane!

Meanwhile they learn nothing about her. Right now though, a little attention for the Birthday girl wouldn’t hurt!

We chill for a bit at our community beach, it’s beautiful down here, the view of the city and the Jura mountains is wonderful. Not really an excursion but at least it’s fun.

Back home there’s finally some normality to this unworthy day, Veronica takes the traditional Birthday Pic.

Look at me, sweet, lovely, perfect posture, with the fancy red ribbon. I’m just gorgeous, if I may say so. Come to think of it I should have a crown, yes a B-Day Crown!

I am the “Queen of the Castle” after all!!

From that moment on, everything follows the “Birthday Rules” in the established, strict order. (At least Veronica hasn’t totally lost her mind)

I get my gifts. The package was delivered today, from Germany, from “Sabro”.

It’s a cool Lama! I love cuddly toys. What? Yes, I know that I have a bunch of them already, so what? Like there’s a rule? BTW it’s very insensitive to bring up this matter right now (or at any other time as a matter of fact)!

There’s a Box of yummy treats too. Veronica gave me a few right away. Usually I have to perform some trick first, very strange, do I sense a little guilt here?

My cake is the best, with candles and all.

It tastes just delicious. Dennis is very shocked at the speed I gulp it down. I have to hurry, you never know, a racoon might sneak in and steal it.

This day did not live up to expectations. Even though I got a gift, a cake and my traditional pic. I’m still very disappointed. I wonder if there is a “Dog Union” where I could file a complaint?

On the plus side, I didn’t get the “Now you have to act you’re age” talk. In other words, I can behave just like I want! I’ve been told we’ll go on a fun excursion, as soon as Dennis is out of quarantine.

That is, if he can take his eyes off those pics of Baby J.

Am I a Spoiled Boxer?

It has come to my attention that “Some People” think I’m spoiled! When asked, Dennis just laughed, “What kind of question is that? Of course she is”!

On what grounds can “People”, (and Dennis), let such a rumour circulate! Who are these “People”? Do they actually know me?? Never judge a book by it’s cover, they say.

I suggest we take a close look at my my life, so these “People”, whoever they are, can see that I’m just a normal, average dog!

I have a few beds, yes, but they all serve very different functions.

The “New bed”, is located by Veronica’s computer, so I can give her moral support with her online activities but most importantly, protect her from intruders.

The “I keep guard” bed is strategically located in the entrance hall. Highly necessary to secure the family, I’m a guard dog, remember?

What? NO, I cannot lie on the floor!! I need to do my job in acceptable conditions. The floor…what a disgrace for a Guard dog of my rank.

The “Basket Bed” is in the living room. Lately, however, I have not been able to use it…

…Little L has taken over, it’s now known to be “Mitt hus” (My house), or even “Min båt” (my boat). You’d think Veronica would dissuade her, but no. Little L is the Princess of the Castle.

(BTW I’m the Queen, just to make things perfectly clear!)

The “Upstairs bed” is where I supervise the back and forth of the staircase.

The guest room is strategically situated on my right. The “Veronica & Dennis Residence” offers complimentary protection services from the local guard dog: Felicia v d Andreashöhe (Me!)

The”Bedroom Bed” is for nights. I love to be close to Veronica. How else will I be able to protect her?

All my beds are from Cloud7. I’ve tried a few other brands. What happened to those? They exploded under mysterious circumstances.

Lately, however, I have sneaked up on the armchair at night, I don’t think Veronica has spotted me. I’m really well hidden.

My comfortable Travel Mat, perfect outside and inside.

This is my “Wait for Dinner mat” (AKA my “Time out mat” but that’s irrelevant in this context.)

Some dogs whine and stare at their masters for food, no point doing that with Veronica. She just ignores me (Trust me, I’ve tried the “whining thing”).

I go to my “Dinner mat” to wait patiently. (Like I have another choice?)

This is my “Walk-in” closet. I have a number of gorgeous leashes. I can see what you’re thinking…probably something close to “OMG that’s insane”! Now let’s get some perspective here, most of those were bought for my Lego.

And there is an explanation:

Veronica has traveled a lot to the US and always brought back a new leash or a collar. Her story is that it’s “Much cheaper and fun” there. I wonder…

Here are a few examples:

Festive: “Halloween”, “Valentine”, “X-Mas”. Sport series; “The Yankees”, “The Giants”. Universities: “Stanford”, “Harvard”. Fun: “Star Wars”, “Leopard” “Glow in the dark” and also a few plain coloured ones to match her outfits (I know, how vain is that?).

Side note: How many shoes do you own? Yes, I thought so.

Veronica mostly uses three meter long leashes bought in Sweden. “It’ll give you a little freedom” (IOW keeps me from sneaking off in the fields to dig).

How can she even use the word “freedom” in this context? I’m on a leash!!

My toy box. Apparently “Lynch Bages” is a fancy wine, Veronica won the 12 bottles at a lottery.

You think I have too many Toys? Some are gifts from lovely people, Santa and the Easter Bunny.

Truth told, there’s another bag of toys in the basement, you see Veronica changes them every month. So I don’t get bored, that’s why I need so many, it makes total sense.

Dennis has a soft spot when it comes to me and my sweet “love you Dennis” look. (FYI not begging! Just my natural charm, apples and oranges here) “Are you hungry Felicia? Here, have a little piece”.

(Works all the time!)

Veronica is immune to any of my vast repertoire of looks.

My personalised bag, a gift from Veronica’s friend VT. So sweet of her. Here we store a few of my belongings and we use it for traveling.

It also contains my more than embarrassing rain coat!! Yep, I can see you agree, I got it on my Birthday, remember? What kind of Birthday gift is that? I ask you???

I look ridiculous. Veronica, on the other hand, thinks I look “Chic”.

On a less embarrassing level, my winter coat. I don’t need a winter coat!! This is not Sweden! Even Veronica’s sister, SPS, (and she is a veterinarian behaviourist, mind you), says so!

But does Veronica listen to her? Her own sister! NO, it’s “Oh Felicia, you might freeze and you look gorgeous”…. Says who???

Veronica even tries to sweet-talk me by telling me these are Cloud7 coats. Like that’s going to make things better. Well, I’ve got news for you: it doesn’t!

Every day we go for long walks, mostly in the woods. Just plain walks, like any normal dog.

Shall we sum up? You’ve probably already made up your mind.

A Bed…or two, a few leashes, some toys, everyday walks…in other words just a normal “Ms ordinary average Boxer’s” life, nothing more.

Now look at me, is this the look of a spoiled Boxer girl?

What’s that now? “You don’t want to hurt my feelings but you think I’m little spoiled?” Did you even read my story properly…oh you did, did you…

Well, I’m deeply hurt and…whatever…anyway, I don’t have time for this nonsense…

…I’m exhausted and need to sleep and rest in the armchair Veronica arranged for me with a soft “SOCIETY” blanket.

“Spoiled Boxer”, my foot!

Boxer Felicia sleeps on Cloud7 Beds:

https://cloud7.de/en/